Pat McAfee, punter for the Indianapolis Colts, was arrested this morning for public intoxication. McAfee went swimming in a canal in downtown Indianapolis and lost his shirt in the process, prompting a buzzkilling call to the 5-0 from a random stranger.
The police asked McAfee how much he had to drink, and he responded with easily the best (or worst, depending on your opinion of the hilarity of this situation) line ever.
"A lot cause I am drunk."
McAfee also told the police he was wet because it had been raining, though his shirt was still in the water. There's still no word yet on whether McAfee wanted hot chocolate or a hug, but we'll keep you posted.