Things we learned today: Jim Nantz has a stick up his ass, Phil Simms can actually be right sometimes and Shonn Greene knows when and where to throw in a funny touchdown celebration.


We're not big fans of the Jets here at D4L, but I can't deny that Greene's celebration is one of the best we've seen this season. The Jets played a great game and deserved to win. Meanwhile, the Patriots continually shot themselves in the foot with plays like this.


Somewhere, Randy Moss is smiling.

[SB Nation]

[Mock Session]

As many people expected would happen, the Bears completely dominated the Seattle Seahawks today. Chicago cruised to a 35-24 win that was respectable thanks to a couple late scores by the Seahawks.

The Bears' big win sets up an OLD SCHOOL FOOTBAWWL matchup with the Green Bay Packers next week that this guy couldn't be more excited about.


[Mock Session]

The Dallas Mavericks have lost 7 of their last 9 games since Dirk Nowitzki went down with a knee injury, but that doesn't mean they still can't have some fun. Fans might think they're in for a treat when they see this video's title, but former Pistons coach Rick Carlisle has other ideas.


I'm surprised no one thought of this sooner. Although, no one wants to see a wardrobe malfunction from The Spare Tires.


[Ball Don't Lie]

This Patriots-Jets game is starting to become a big deal. The shit started flying earlier this week when Jets CB Antonio Cromartie called Tom Brady an "asshole," presumably because he appreciates irony (Cromartie has 9 kids with 8 women, 'nuff said). Now, things are getting personal.


Yup, that's Wes Welker (of all people) making jokes about Rex Ryan's Google search history. Welker isn't the only one jabbing at the idea, though. The Boston Metro went all out with their Friday cover.


And what's some trash talk without the New York Post getting involved? (Though, to be honest, this is pretty tame for them.)


If this game is half of what the build up is making it, we're in for a classic come Sunday afternoon.

[Guyism]

[SB Nation Philly] 

Darko Milicic has created plenty of memorable moments from his illustrious NBA career, but this tip-in is definitely one of the best for the former "Human Victory Cigar."


Once again, Pistons fans are reminded that GM Joe Dumars drafted this superstar over bums like Carmelo Anthony, Dwyane Wade and Chris(tina) Bosh (not to mention several other warm bodies). Thanks for the memories, D.

[The Basketball Jones]

Other than that stupid crystal football, I wasn't sure what the winner of the BCS National Championship game received to commemorate such an amazing, emotional occassion. Thanks to ESPN's Brent Musberger, now we know.


See? This is why we need a playoff system. The next game could be for all the Pace salsa a 300 lb. lineman could need and everyone would be happy.

[Mock Session] 

As all guys who are whipped in a relationship know, it's important to keep your lady happy. LeBron James kept Cleveland happy for 7 long years, but a summer of turmoil ending in an hour-long Decision ended what was once a happy, if somewhat dysfunctional relationship*.


Since LeBron didn't keep his old boo Cleveland happy, shit's gotten reaaallllll awkward. The Cavaliers have gone as far as to change their hotel plans in Los Angeles this week to stay away from LeBron and his new flame, Chris(tina) Bosh the Miami Heat.

*As much as I want to call LeBron the woman in the relationship, this fits perfectly. He said something stupid and his "woman" flipped out and will hold a grudge for years to come. It's science... or something like that.

[ESPN]

Washington Wizards F/C JaVale McGee is one of the three "other guys" in this year's dunk contest Blake Griffin Show. While we haven't seen what Brandon Jennings or Serge Ibaka are preparing, McGee gave fans a peek at what could be on the way.


There's still no way he beats Blake Griffin, but he's definitely got something going here. Hopefully he's able to keep things competitive in the finals.

[Ball Don't Lie]

Seattle's Marshawn Lynch didn't do much with his first 18 carries in today's NFC Divisional Playoff Game, netting only 64 yards. However, he made amends with his 19th carry of the day by sealing the Seahawks' 41-36 win.


Unfortunately for Marshawn and his teammates, they are still a game under .500 on the season and won't have their vaunted (and ripped-off) home field advantage next week against either the Falcons or Bears.

[SB Nation]

If you're not watching the Orange Bowl, you need to see this touchdown pass by Virginia Tech's Tyrod Taylor. If you are watching the game, you have probably been refreshing your favorite website (D4L, of course) waiting for this video to be posted. Either way, enjoy.

Stanford currently leads 13-9, but Andrew Luck just threw an interception. Hopefully we'll see more fireworks from Taylor soon.

[SB Nation]